Barry B Benson Funny Barry B Benson With No Eybroes
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Quotes
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Barry B. Benson : Ya like jazz?
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Barry B. Benson : How about a suicide pact?
Vanessa : How do we do it?
Barry B. Benson : I'll sting you, you step on me.
Vanessa : That just kills you twice.
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Barry B. Benson : This sweater is Ralph Lauren, and I have no pants.
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Vanessa : Why don't you just fly everywhere? Isn't it faster?
Barry B. Benson : Flying is exhausting. Why don't you humans just run everywhere, isn't that faster?
Vanessa : I see your point.
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Adam Flayman : Wow! She looked hot!
Barry B. Benson : She's my cousin!
Adam Flayman : She is?
Barry B. Benson : Yes, we're *all* cousins.
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Barry B. Benson : Tivo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane.
Vanessa : What, you don't have anything like that?
Barry B. Benson : We have "Hivo", But it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease.
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Barry B. Benson : You know, there is a Larry King in the real world.
Bee Larry King : It's a common name.
Barry B. Benson : He has suspenders, a desk, a TV show, different color lights behind him, and a marquee at the bottom of the screen saying what was just said even though you just heard him.
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Barry B. Benson : Three days of grade school, three days of high school...
Adam Flayman : Those were tough days.
Barry B. Benson : ...three days of college, I'm glad I took a day off in the middle to hitchhike around the hive.
Adam Flayman : You did come back different.
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Barry B. Benson : This is your queen? That's a guy in women's clothes! That's a *drag* queen!
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Barry B. Benson : Yellow-black, yellow-black, yellow-black, yellow-black... Oh, black and yellow. Yeah, let's shake it up a little.
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Trudy : And you'll be happy to know that bees as a species haven't had a day off in 27 billion years. Whew!
Barry B. Benson : So you'll just work us to death?
Trudy : We'll sure try.
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Ken : Well, well, well, a royal flush!
Barry B. Benson : You're bluffing.
Ken : Am I?
[flushes toilet. Barry grabs the Emory board and uses it to surf]
Barry B. Benson : Surf's up, dude!
[splashes water on Ken]
Ken : Ew. Poo water.
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Vanessa : My only interest is flowers.
Barry B. Benson : You know, our last queen was elected with that very slogan.
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Barry B. Benson : Larry, bees have never afraid to change the world. I mean, what about Bee Columbus, Bee Ghandi, Bee-Jesus?
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Adam Flayman : Did you hear about Frankie?
Barry B. Benson : Yeah.
Adam Flayman : Are you going to his funeral?
Barry B. Benson : No, I'm not going to his funeral. Everyone knows you sting someone, you die. You don't waste it on a squirrel. He was such a hothead.
Adam Flayman : I guess he could have just gotten out of the way.
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Barry B. Benson : We demand an end to the glorification of the bear as nothing more than a vicious, smelly, ill-tempered, big-headed stink machine. I believe we all know what they do in the woods.
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Adam Flayman : What do you thing the humans will do to us if we lose?
Barry B. Benson : I don't know, Adam.
Adam Flayman : I hear they put roaches in motels.
Barry B. Benson : Adam, they check in, but they never check out.
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Barry B. Benson : Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning?
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Barry B. Benson : He's no goodfella, He's a BADfella!
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Vanessa : What happened here?
Barry B. Benson : I tried talking to these guys, and then there was a dustbuster, a toupee and a liferaft exploded... now one's bald, one's in a boat, and they're both unconscious!
Vanessa : Is that another bee joke?
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Barry B. Benson : Sorry I'm late, where should I sit?
Rose Parade Princess : Who are you?
Barry B. Benson : I believe I'm the pea.
Rose Parade Princess : The pea is supposed to be under the mattresses!
Barry B. Benson : Not in this fairy tale sweetheart.
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Adam Flayman : This is over!
Barry B. Benson : Eat this.
[shoves one of Vanessa's crumbs into Adam's mouth]
Adam Flayman : This is not over! What was that?
Barry B. Benson : They call it a crumb.
Adam Flayman : That's so stingin' stripey!
Barry B. Benson : And that's not even what they eat. That just falls off what they eat.
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Barry B. Benson : Quite a lot of pomp, under the circumstances.
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Vanessa : How did you learn to do that?
Barry B. Benson : Do what?
Vanessa : That, that... the talking thing?
Barry B. Benson : Same way you did, I guess. Mama, dada, honey, you pick it up.
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Mooseblood : Stand perfectly still!
Barry B. Benson : You're not dead?
Mooseblood : Do I look like I'm dead! Hey, man! They will wipe anything that moves. Where are you headed?
Barry B. Benson : To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here.
Mooseblood : I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood. Crazy stuff! Blows your head off.
Ladybug : I'm going to Tacoma.
Barry B. Benson : [to a grasshopper] What about you?
Mooseblood : He really is dead.
Barry B. Benson : All right.
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Barry B. Benson : What in the name of mighty Hercules is this? How did this get here? Cute Bee? Golden Blossom? Ray Liotta Private Select?
Vanessa : What is he, an actor?
Barry B. Benson : I've never heard of him. What is this doing here?
Vanessa : For people. We eat it.
Barry B. Benson : You eat it? You don't have enough food of your own? Where did you get this?
Vanessa : From bees. Bees make it...
Barry B. Benson : I know who makes it! And it's hard to make it! There's heating, and stirring, and there's this big krelman thing.
Vanessa : It's organic.
Barry B. Benson : It's *our* ganic!
Vanessa : It's just honey, Barry.
Barry B. Benson : It's just... What? This is our whole life, and you're taking it without permission! This is stealing! You're taking our homes, our schools, our hospitals... It's all we have! And it's on sale? I'm gonna get to the bottom of this. I'm gonna get to the bottom of all of it!
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Barry B. Benson : I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it.
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Barry B. Benson : Mister Sting, thank you for coming. Your name intrigues me, I must say. Where have I heard that name before?
Sting : I was in a band called The Police.
Barry B. Benson : But, you've never been a police officer of any kind, have you?
Sting : No, I haven't.
Barry B. Benson : No, you haven't. And so you see, this is just another example of bee culture being casually stolen for nothing more than a prance-about stage name!
Sting : Oh, please.
Barry B. Benson : Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting? Because I feel stung, Sting... or should I say, Gordon M. Sumner?
Layton T. Montgomery : That's not his real name? You idiots!
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Cow : Milk, cream, it's all me, and I don't see a nickel!
Barry B. Benson : Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
Cow : Sometimes I just feel like a piece of meat!
Barry B. Benson : I had no idea.
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Barry B. Benson : Listen everyone. This runway is covered with the last pollen from the last flowers available anywhere on Earth. That means this is our last chance. We're the only ones who make honey, pollinate flowers, and dress like this. If we're going to survive as a species, this is our moment. So what do you all say? Are we going to be bees, or just Museum of Natural History key chains?
Bees : We're bees!
Keychain Bee : Keychain!
Barry B. Benson : Then follow me! Except keychain.
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Barry B. Benson : What is that?
Ken : Italian Vogue.
Barry B. Benson : Mamma mia! That's a lot of pages.
Ken : It's a lot of ads.
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Vanessa : Are you all right?
Barry B. Benson : Yeah. What was that? Clip and Save circular?
Vanessa : Yes, it was. How did you know?
Barry B. Benson : Felt like about ten pages. 75 is pretty much our limit.
Vanessa : You sure got that down to a science.
Barry B. Benson : Oh, we have to. You know, I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue.
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Barry B. Benson : ...when he finally gets there, he runs up the steps, into the church, the wedding is on and he says "Watermelon? I thought you said Guatamelan, why would I marry a watermelon?" ha ha ha
Vanessa : Oh! is that uh, a bee joke?
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Adam Flayman : He's dating a human florist!
Janet Benson : GASP
Adam Flayman : And they makeout!
Janet Benson : Barry...
Barry B. Benson : We do not makeout.
Adam Flayman : You wish you could!
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Barry B. Benson : Remember what Van said, why is your life more valuable than mine?
Ken : Funny, I just can't seem to recall that!
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Adam Flayman : You met someone? Was she beeish? Not a wasp! Your parents will kill you. Is she a cicada?
Barry B. Benson : Nah.
Adam Flayman : Is it a spider?
Barry B. Benson : You know, I've never been attracted to spiders. I know they're the hottest thing around, with the eight legs, but I just can't get past that face.
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Layton T. Montgomery : Mr. Benson Bee, I'm going to ask what I think the entire court here would like to know... what exactly is your relationship to that woman?
Barry B. Benson : We're friends.
Layton T. Montgomery : Good friends?
Barry B. Benson : Yes.
Layton T. Montgomery : How good?
Barry B. Benson : Now, hang on...
Layton T. Montgomery : Do you live together?
Barry B. Benson : Wait, that's not...
Layton T. Montgomery : Are you her little... bedbug?
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Vanessa : It's very hard to concentrate with that panicky tone in your voice.
Barry B. Benson : It's not a tone, I'm PANICKING!
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Jock #2 : We're going 0900 J-Gate, what do think fuzzy boy, are you Bee enough?
Barry B. Benson : That depends, on what 0900 means?
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Adam Flayman : [On the bee testing a helmet] What do you think he makes?
Barry B. Benson : Not enough.
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Barry B. Benson : Ya know, I'm going to drain the ol' stinger.
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Barry B. Benson : Mr. Liotta, first, may I offer my belated congratulations on your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005.
Ray Liotta : Thank you, thank you, hahaha!
Barry B. Benson : I also see from your resume that you're devilishly handsome but with a churning inner turmoil that's always ready to blow.
Ray Liotta : I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime?
Barry B. Benson : Not yet it isn't. But is this what's come to you, Mr. Liotta? Exploiting tiny helpless bees so you don't have to rehearse your part and learn your lines, sir?
Ray Liotta : Watch it, Benson! I can blow right now!
Barry B. Benson : This isn't a good fella, this is a bad fella!
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Barry B. Benson : I see you also made Honeyburton and Honron!
Klauss Vanderhayden : Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms.
Barry B. Benson : Beekeeper. I find that a very disturbing term if I have to say. I don't imagine you employ any beefreers, do you?
Klauss Vanderhayden : No.
Barry B. Benson : I'm sorry, I couldn't hear you.
Klauss Vanderhayden : No.
Barry B. Benson : No. Because you don't free bees, you keep bees.
[a bear shaped jar of honey is shown]
Barry B. Benson : In fact, it seems you thought a bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of honey.
Klauss Vanderhayden : Well, they're lovable creatures. Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear... Build-a-Bear?
Barry B. Benson : Yeah. You mean like this?
[a bear shows up at the courtroom]
Barry B. Benson : Bears kill bees! How'd you like his head crashing through your living room? Biting into your couch? Spitting out your throw pillows? Roar, roar. Okay, that's enough. Take him away.
[the bear goes back through the door]
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Barry B. Benson : Look at these faces. They never knew what hit them and now they're on the road to nowhere.
Source: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0389790/characters/nm0000632
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